ToMyChildren

YouKnowTheOneNoOneWants

by Vonia Martin (AKA V.)(AKA Bitch)(AKA your worst nightmare)

If you happen to be one of the lucky ones and find yourself in the foster care system, you are my child. At this point in my life you are probably more like my grandchild. Totally not funny but true.

The most important thing I can tell you, that I need you to believe; you are not alone. There maybe miles that seperate us, language barriers, cultual differences but none of the things that seperate us is stronger then what makes us family; circumstances. Experiences unites us as one. No one else on the planet knows what we do and that is how to survive on our own. It appears from every other perspective that we are dependant on everyone else when in fact we are not. They cannot stand the idea that we can get along fine without anyone. Not that we want to or that it ends well for those with no one but we do exist. 

Most of us kill ourselves before our 18th birthday because what do we have to look forward to? Most people think I'm too stupid to hate life. Those same people also thought I would be long dead by now. Well, I'm not and not for my lack of trying because I put myself into every extremely risky situation that I could find and nothing. There was a time I had to ask "what does a girl have to do to get killed around here?" Here I still am. There was a time that I would have bet I would be dead by now and I too would have lost. The drug induced coma I've been in for the past 25+ years is wearing off and reality is setting in. There are so many more kids like me out there that need help and I'm in no position to be able to help them. I have totally let my kind down. All I have left are my words and the desire to help those aging out of the foster care system in any way I can. 

The wisest thing I can say is don't be like me. Be stronger, be aspiring, be a role model, give these kids someone to look up to. Be the example! 

Sure there are people out there that have it worse off then a bunch of kids without family and there are a lot of agencies to help them, these kids have very few. Believe me when I tell you that a child knows when it's not wanted as aposed to being taken away or orphaned.  It is the difference between kidnapped and running away. One is chosen the other is forced.

When I was 8 I use to pray not to wake up in the morning. I would beg god to please stop the hell I found myself in. The foster home I was in was perfectly nice but they weren't mine so I couldn't tolerate being there. No family is good enough not when you know your own. They could have beaten me and the feeling would have been the same. As it was they did no such thing but they may as well have. It's hard to explain but if you are a foster parent please understand it has nothing to do with you. All your foster child knows is that you are not their family, you are strangers. No matter how much you want them to be grateful they can't. If they express gratitude it is a sign of betrayal. They don't want their family coming to get them only to find that they betrayed them. This is a huge fear! THEIR FAMILY WILL BE BACK. When they do they must be ready and not tied to these strangers. 

It's time to let go of your family because they would want you to. Most likely your family only gave you up so you could have a better life, one they could not provide for you. So stop denying yourself this opportunity for a better life. Your family obviously thought you deserved this chance so please take it.No one is going to punish you or blame you for getting on with your life, it is the only one you are going to have so live it by any means necessary.

AppleMusicNotAmmusing

ItSucks!

Another bitch by Vonia Martin

 Apple music is such a rip off! They take $15.99 out of my account every month, for what? For me not to be able to listen to the music I already paid for? It has to be because that is exactly what happens every month. It's true, I admit, I'm not the sharpest pencil in the box but come on. For one, this amount is rediculus! I use to pay less for Netflix and got a hell of a lot more fore my money. We are talking about music that I already paid $.99-$3.99 per song for or albums starting at $12.99. Why was I able to listen to my music, music I bought online then downloaded onto my computer then transferred to my iPod, on my iPod at no additional cost? Why was someone able to get my music and put it on their device without my permission? Why am I paying $15.99 for a family package when I have no family?

Not only that, I can't always access my music library. You heard right. About half the time I'm working out my music stops, or repeats same song over and over, or stops in middle of one song to start another and keeps doing this until I just shut it off. More and more I feel I'm paying Apple to raise my blood pressure and put me in anger management classes because I almost lose it some times. Maybe you're trying to drive me to throwing my phone in the street out of frustration forcing me to buy a new phone. Not going to happen! lol Just kidding. It does seem like every thing and everyone is against me at times but that's how frustrated I get. It only takes me working against myself to prevent me from succeeding, for this I need no assistance. So back off Apple Music and give me what I pay for every month or give me a refund for all the months I couldn't even use or listen to my music and the ones that only gave me pieces of songs. It only seems fair since you continue to over charge me for something I should be able to do anyway for free. Charge a one time fee for the app if you must but a monthly charge to listen to music already paid for? How greedy is Apple? It appears pretty fucking greedy. Not only do they take $15.99 for what I'm assuming is music they also take $1.99, $2.99, $5.99, and sometimes all the above in a single month. With no explanation on what it's for. 

My inability to remain cool when dealing with people or in this case a company that is ripping me off keeps me from directly dealing with the situation. Makes no sense, I know, but eventually I run out of money and the madness will stop. 

 

PitchForRealityTVShow

Aging Out

By Vonia Martin

My idea is this: 

The set would be a ranch that is finantially in trouble. It's run down, so needs lots of minor repairs. The animals need attention including vet care. The roof leaks in main house. There are several buildings on property including a barn, chicken coop, and several shacks. The land needs attention to get it ready for planting.

Goal:

To turn the ranch into a self sustaining enterprise. Meaning it needs no outside help to support itself. As a matter of fact the ranch makes enough money to support a small staff that cares for everything pertaining to the ranch. 

List of potential money generating ideas; eggs, dairy, food, art, and any product the foster kids come up with.

Players; Me or someone else, a handy man, and about a dozen kids aging out of the system. A couple of professionals to help with any mantal issues and to keep an eye on everything.

Every morning starts with a brain storming, clearing the air, bitch session and meeting to discuss all things ranch and foster care. Everyone has a voice in this meeting and everyone's ideas are heard and seriously considered before implemented or tossed aside. 

The young adults that are chosen for this show should be aging out of the system and have no place to go. They aren't the best or the worse just some where in between. Obviously, they will have different levels of intelligence but should have the basics down i.e. reading, writing, math, and science. No real special abilities or talent but not void of them either. Six girls and six boys with the same sleeping quarters. These kids need to be able to have relationships that don't enclude sex. It maybe the only way they were able to survive but that is over now they never have to deal with that shit again. 

Many will come with their own baggage so we must be prepared to deal with a variety of problems. Maybe at least have me on the initial show where I can talk with them and set the stage for the best possable out come.  

Kids must be in good physical shape with no diseases or chronic illness. Mental health is a different story. No child aging out of the system is of good mental standing. We will seek the least mentally destroyed kids possible. 

Actually I want to pick the kids. At the end I want to give the ranch to the kids that starred in the show. 

These kids would other wise never know home ownership or a possitive future that they worked for and earned. Hopefully, they will then find other kids aging out of the system and teach them to manage the ranch and pass it to them when they die and on it should go. 

Mostly I want to shed a light on the every day stuggles these young adults go through just to get through the day. I want people to know what it means not to have family. People should be aware of how rare it is for these kids to reach adulthood, let alone reach retirement age. How little to no programs exist to assist these kids to enter the work force and succeed. Once they age out they are on their own with little to no knowledge on how to get along in the "real" world. 

Products made by the kids at the ranch will be on display and ready to sell at the end of each program. All the proceeds go directly to the artist or an account set up for them for their future education or investment money. 

A finacial institution should step forward and volunteer to handle these kid's money. We are talking about children that have never had anything in their life. This is it for them so every effert should be made to keep this money safe yet making more money for the future of these kids. They need to know and understand the power of money and to keep it in perspective. Never does it have more value then animals, people, or Mother Nature. The planet should always come first because without it we all die. These kids deserve a future and a chance to secure the future of kids that have yet to enter the system.

It would be so nice if instead of foster kid they were called students of cultural differences. Student is a much more optimistic word giving hope to the future with knowledge. Knowledge is power but I understand not wanting to be responsible for what goes wrong. Not to worry I will handle this part. For some reason I have   foresightbeen given the gift of common sense and foresight not to mention deducive reasoning(it only took me 5 times to ge that right)

                                                

MyAstrologicalChart

 

This is not the same chart I received before. It makes me believe this is bullshit. No one’s chart should change but because I am a foster kid not a kid any more but aged out of the system I was denied my birth chart until I “earned” it, so to speak. I mean, who gives up a kid with a chart like mine? It seams impossible but yet it happened. I also have an IQ of 137, or greater, but they took that from me too. I wish I knew why my life has been the way it is because I could have really been someone. For whatever reason this is my life and until recently my chart reflected what my life has been “Nothing”. Something changed though and now I have my real chart, thank you very much. I believe I wrote something that earned me the truth. The truth is that someone or several someones dropped the ball when it comes to me. Starting with seeing the stupid gorilla instead of remembering the numbers I was to remember. Then telling my adopted mom I cheated on the IQ test. Then claiming that stupid machine thingy was broken, both of them, when it tested me at the Scientology building in California and Colorado. How does that happen? I even took a couple of seminars to “clear” myself but some how I cheated that as well. No one wants me to be anything so I am not even though I have tried. My real name was Vonia Sue Smith then my mom’s sixth husband adopted me and I became Vonia Sue Blastow then I was adopted again and my named changed to Vonia Sue Martin. I did meet my real mom when I was 21 and she told me at what time I was born because it is not on my adopted birth certificate. That did not change my lying chart though. That didn’t change until after I was 50.

FromStudentToSlave

 FreedomMyAss

By V. Martin

If the government and other lenders really want to help the children of tomorrow stop charging interest on student loans. How irresponsible of us to allow this! Isn’t it hard enough as it is to make it in the world today without starting off in debt?  If we have to pay interest on the knowledge we gain from a higher education then all further knowledge on that subject will be free for as long as they are being charged interest on the money it took to gain that knowledge. Or something like that. People that are not able to make a living from the knowledge they gained in college should not be charged interest. Those that are should have to pay interest as long as they make money from that knowledge even after the loan is paid.

No one wants to be made to pay back money they never borrowed yet that is exactly what is happening to me. Not only did I not borrow money for school that year I had dropped out before the tuition deadline but I’m being charged for it anyway. On top of that none of the money I have paid so far has been subtracted from the balance. Now who would continue to pay on a loan they never got and the one they did get never goes down no matter how much has been pay? No one!

They hook you by promising student loan forgiveness but they do not mean it. All they mean to do is take more of your money, make it look like you just got the loan, and have made no payment. Try getting any where in life with bad credit. My boyfriend has a bankruptcy on his credit but his credit score is higher than mine! WTF? All that is on my credit is this stupid student loan and yet it is enough to make my interest rates 23-25% on the few credit cards I qualify for. My car insurance for just liability was $70 a month because of my poor score. Never have I used any of the knowledge gained by taking the classes I will never be able to pay for to make money. 

My last point on the subject, I promise.

I aged out of the system in Arizona after they let my adopted mom disown me after meeting and marrying a man who didn’t want me there. So the state of Arizona became my parent and therefore should pay for my higher education, like any good parent would. Even if I was a poor student as long as I was trying, they might of even got me a tutor to ensure my success. As it was no one helped me even when it was obvious I needed it.

What’s wrong with you people that you let someone like me slip through the cracks? What bullshit did you tell yourself in order to make it alright to throw me under the bus?  I am not like other people!!!!

ToAllParents

Give Kids Until They are 21

by. V. Martin

Keep kids until they are 21 so they won't drive until they are 18. This will help save our planet. 

ToAllTeenAgers

Save The Planet

by V. Martin

This is a lot to ask but if I have my way you will get some thing back. If all you kids would agree not to drive until you're 18 you're parents will be responsible for you until you are 21. We should be extending childhood since we are living so much longer. We need kids concentrating on their studies and staying in school. School should be extended too, 9th-14th should be high school grades. Pre-school should start right afther birth with virtual instructors and Zoom visits. Kids should start grade school as soon as they are out of diapers, walking, and talking they should be going to school.  This age may differ slightly for everyone, it will be up to the teachers to bring them all to the same level. Childhood is the best time of our lives, or so it should be, shouldn't we add some of the years extending our life to the front of it? If the young adults of the world would take it apon themselves to lead the way in saving their planet the  adults may step up to do the same. Maybe not quit driving but recycling, planting some trees, volunteering, and just being more aware of our individual impact on the world. Not driving until you are 18 may not be the last thing society asks of you in the hopes of controlling global warming because your impact is just beginning. The habits you form now will have a lasting effect on the quality of life you lead in the future. So many things influence our health because it all leads back into itself and if we would stop jamming up the process things would correct themselves. We have to do the immpossible, step back and do nothing just like we have been doing only some of us have to go back to work. We can't keep doing what we've been doing or we are all going to die along with all other life on the planet.

As a human being, a conscientious life form with the ability to communicate through language our ideas, experiences, and feelings we are responsible for the rest of Mother's life forms that have no such abilities. She didn't create all the different animals just so we could kill them. We have eyes to observe the rest of the wonders around us so we can appreciate them, not destroy them. We have lungs to breathe fresh air not choke on the exhaust from trucks and cars zooming by. We have ears to listen to birds, the wind, bugs, and predators that might do us harm. We have a nose to smell the flowers and animals marking their territory. 

If we allow her to do her thing she takes care of her own and guess what we are her own. It may be hard at first but it will get easier as we witness her correcting the mess we have made. 

Oh boy, I'm starting to ramble so that's it for now. Thank you for reading and considering what I've written here.